Kim Kardashian entered dangerous territory last night (Dec. 4) on “Kourtney & Kim Take New York.” Since she’s facing marriage fraud charges, everything she says can and will be used against her. And she said a lot.
The lawyers apparently haven’t taken over editing of the reality show yet. There was plenty of evidence to support estranged husband Kris Humphries’ annulment petition.
For one, Kim clearly seemed to act like Humphries had auditioned for a part in her show.
Kris obviously didn’t fully realize what he was getting into until everyone went back to their day jobs after the wedding.
That’s when he discovered that reality television and reality are one and the same for the Kardashians.
Kim just can’t understand why Kris is unhappy living in an apartment with crazy sister Kourtney, her screaming kid Mason and Kourtney’s dyspeptic baby daddy Scott Disick.
Could it be because it isn’t a marital home, it’s the set of her show?
Kim also couldn’t get why Kris wanted to focus on his job; rather than job she hired him for, reality show husband.
No wonder he fled to his hometown in Minnesota. He needed a dose of real reality, after all that fake reality.
Leave it to sister Khloe Kardashian to try to get the dysfunctional marriage back on track.
After hearing that Kim and Kris have barely lived together, she asks why Kim is in New York while her husband is sulking in the Land of 10,000 Lakes.
For all Khloe’s trouble, Kim calls her “an ugly little troll” in an email.
But Kim got the hint and flew to Minnesota to try to work things out. Kim decides to play “a normal wife” and make dinner.
“Is this what it feels like to like actually be married?” Kris says, obviously making clear his marriage up until then has been a sham.
But things go down hill from there. In an emotional argument, Kim claims Kris only cares about basketball. (Is that so wrong?)
Kris follows Kim upstairs and finds her crying as she’s packing to leave.
“We’re not gonna have a successful marriage if we live in different states,” she says.
So what’s Kim’s solution? They only have to live together part of the time, she suggests.
“I need a husband,” Kim pleads tearfully, promising they will get their own apartment like a real married couple back to New York.
The footage was obviously included to show that Kim really did try to make the marriage work, even if Khloe had to shame her into going.
But when they return to New York, Kris learns that it’s all a ploy; he still has to live with Kourtney and Scott.
So how is he greeted? “The Hump is back,” Kourtney says dismissively.
Of course, Kris still gets the oaf treatment.
After seeing Kim for the first time in days, he cuddles with her on the bed and proclaims: “Your armpits smell like a combination of fish and hot garbage.”
Did he really just say that, or was he fed that line to provoke some drama?
It just seems a little too contrived to be spontaneous. In fact, every time Kris utters one of his bone-headed comments he smirks a little, as if he knows it’s all scripted.
In the end, Kim fired Kris from her show. If that’s not marriage fraud what is?