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Jon Stewart Raps Rupe Time-Warner Bid; Unveils Plan to Buy CNN (video!)

Jon Stewart unveils his plan to pickup up CNN, providing Rupert Murdoch casts it off after buying Time-Warner's media properties.

Jon Stewart unveils his plan to pickup up CNN, providing Rupert Murdoch casts it off after buying Time-Warner’s media properties.

Jon Stewart has Rupert Murdoch pegged; he’s got “a face like a rotting pumpkin” and “farts dust,” he says. But the 83-year-old mogul is personally worth $13.9 billion so he can pretty much do what he wants.

And what Rupert wants is to buy Time-Warner’s media empire for a cool $80 billion.

Did we mention… Rupe, as he’s often called, usually gets what he wants? Remember Dow Jones?

Stewart wants to pick up some of the pieces that the media mogul spits out. CNN, the perennial, flagging cable news outlet is high on the list. Afterall, Rupe already owns Fox News.

“Now of course, it [CNN] wouldn’t come cheap, though, with analysts saying the network could be worth about $10 billion on the open market,” he said.

Only problem is Jon’s a few billion dollars short.

“That’s a lot of money for anyone, but not a lot of money for everyone,” he noted. “Which is why we are starting our kickstarter campaign to buy CNN.”

Hell yeah! So, this is where viewers come in.

Stewart joked last night (July 22), about launching a kick-starter campaign to raise the money from ordinary folk, and offered a whole list of crazy incentives to encourage contributions.

If successful, Stewart promises to take CNN back to its roots.

Check out the video below; it’s hilarious. And, be sure to follow TheImproper on Twitter for the latest comedy news.

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