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Jon Stewart Likens Brian Williams Lying to Masturbation (watch!)

Jon Stewart compares NBC News Anchor Brian Williams lying to masturbation, but says the real crime is the media's failed coverage of the Iraq War. (Photo: Getty)

Jon Stewart compares NBC News Anchor Brian Williams lying to masturbation, but says the real crime is the media’s failed coverage of the Iraq War. (Photo: Getty)

Jon Stewart compared NBC anchor Brian Williams’ lies about his Iraq War experiences to masturbation last night (Feb. 9) on “The Daily Show.” But he contrasted the uproar with the media’s dreadful reporting about the actual war.

The segment was also dripping with hypocrisy as Stewart aired the shock…shock! at Fox News over Williams’ embellishments.

Fox is a regular punching bag on “The Daily Show” for its right-wing distortions of politics and world events. So, it was equal parts hilarious to see the righteous indignation spewing from their pundits.

Stewart opened his piece with a forlorn “Bri…”

“Why?” he questioned.

“Why Bri. Why Bri lie? …Sigh. We’re you Bri high?”

Stewart did his best to mock explain Brian’s problem, blaming it on the “Celebritabelum,” a part of the brain that controls celebrity-think.

“Like with most cases of masturbation, typically, being caught is punishment enough. Self-love can be a bad habit. Probably shouldn’t do it at your work desk,” he explained.

“but it’s more sin than crime, wouldn’t you agree? I’m sure his colleagues would agree,” he added.

Cut to a stream of Fox News clips where the story is getting hyped to the extreme.

“The media is on it!” he hollered.

“This may seem like overkill, but for me, no, it is not overkill, because I am happy,” he explained.

“Finally, someone is being held to account for misleading American about the Iraq War. It might not necessarily be the first person you’d want held accountable on that list.

“But never again will Brian Williams mislead this great nation about being shot at in a war we probably wouldn’t have ended up in if the media had applied this level of scrutiny to the actual fuc*ing war.”

The Fox News coverage hit its nadir when some frothing talking head compared Megyn Kelly to Walter Cronkite, the legendary CBS anchor.

“Will [the media] go back and look at other instances of media malfeasance that lead our country to the most catastrophic foreign policy decision in decades?” asked Stewart.

Nah…

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